Sep. 20, 2026
Valentine’s Story: We have to
There are a lot of __________ __________ in this world (and
God’s people are to love them)
Twice in Galatians 5, Paul declares believers are ______ (1a
and 13a) . . . But we are not ________ to sin (v 13)
We have been freed from the bondage of sin so we can live life
as God created. When it comes to how we are to live with
others it can be summed up in a single _______________
(Leviticus 19:18, Matthew 22:37-40, Romans 13:8-10, John
13:34-35)
This is a commandment, not a ____________ (We have to) . . .
the command to love is found over _______ times in the New
Testament)
There are four words in the Greek language translated “love” (C.
S. Lewis “The Four Loves”).
Agape love is unconditional love, to desire the good of the other.
It is _____________ love.
Agape love is a ___________. It is not based on emotion, which
is why it can be commanded
I find it helpful to think of Agape as a ________
How is Jesus command to love one another new? . . . Jesus’
command in John 13:34 goes much ___________ (“as I have
loved you”)
1. Jesus loves without ______________ (Romans 15:7,
2. Jesus loves ____________ (1 John 3:16)
3. Jesus’ love was gracious, patient, forgiving (Ephesians 4:32)
God doesn’t expect us to love in this way by our own
__________ . . . . “as I have loved you that you might love one
another”
As we experience God’s love we are then _____________ to
love others more fully (Romans 5:5, 8-10, Hosea)
Do you know God’s great love for you? That is the starting point
God didn’t send a ____________ ________, He did something
far, far, far beyond that in sending His Son.
Spend some time with God on how to improve in loving others .
. . . remember, ‘we have to”
Assignment: Read 1 Corinthians 13:4-7, then read it inserting
Jesus’ name for “love”, finally read it inserting your own name
for “love”. Example: Matt is patient, Matt is kind, Matt does not
envy . . . . .
Supplemental:
FORGIVING OTHERS
(It’s not easy but it is required by God and is for our own good.)
God’s call for us to forgive is clear in the Bible (ex: Matthew
6:14-16; Mark 11:25; Matthew 18:21-22; Colossians 3:13;
Ephesians 4:32; and let’s not forget “forgive us our debts as we
forgive . . .” in Matthew 6:12). It can help to know what forgiveness
is not. Forgiveness is not pretending nothing wrong happened; it’s
not overlooking abuse; it’s not letting others walk all over you; it’s
not refusing to press charges when a crime has been committed;
it’s not forgetting the wrong done; it doesn’t mean you must be
friends with them or automatically trust them again.
Forgiveness means, among other things, wiping the slate clean,
to cancel a debt, releasing your right to punish another.
Part of forgiving means we will “forget” their sin. This does not
mean we don’t have memory of what happened but it means we will
not seek to strike back in response to the wrong done to us, it
means we will not act toward them according to the wrong done.
(This is what is meant by God ‘forgetting’ our sin. God has memory
of all things but it means God will not recall our sin and act upon it.)
To forget someone’s sin will mean we
WILL NOT BRING IT UP TO THEM (throw in it in their face)
WILL NOT BRING IT UP TO OTHERS (to trash them)
WILL NOT BRING IT UP TO OURSELVES (to rehash)
WE WILL NOT SEEK TO GET EVEN (will not seek revenge)
Forgiving can be hard---and can take time---but it is very
important to our own well-being that we forgive. If we don’t forgive,
we will grow more and more bitter; we will develop an unforgiving
spirit, impacting how we treat others and not just the one person
from whom we are withholding forgiveness; and our not forgiving
will stunt our spiritual growth in becoming more and more as we
were created to be---more in God’s image because God is the most
forgiving being of all.
There are a couple of good books to help learn to forgive:
“Forgive and Forget” and “Art of Forgiving” by Lew Smedes;“Total
Forgiveness” by RT Kendall; section 2 in “What’s So Amazing
About Grace” by Philip Yancey; and chapters 1 & 2 in “God’s
Outrageous Claims” by Lee Strobel. Some helpful things I have
learned to help me do better at forgiving.
1. Always remember how much I have been forgiven, how
God has forgiven me a multi-billion dollar debt I owed due to my sin.
When I remember how great a debt God has forgiven me I am
better able to forgive the smaller debts others owe me due to their
sinning against me. Notice I said smaller, not small. The wrongs
done against you may be significant, even very significant, but
when you understand all God has forgiven you what has been done
to you is smaller. (See the parable of two debtors in Matthew
18:21-35)
2. Pray for them---for their well-being. Regardless of how I
feel about them I can still pray for their good, praying God’s
blessings on them. (Matthew 5:43-48)
3. Remember how those who have wronged me have been
wronged themselves and are likely very damaged people. Do
you want to know how someone can do such a terrible thing to you?
Part of the answer is they can do so because they have had bad
things done to them and are damaged people. “Hurt people hurt
people”. This doesn’t excuse their behavior but it helps to
remember they are damaged people.
4. Do good toward them, even before you feel any forgiveness
toward them. Send them anonymous gifts. Make it a point to
speak well of them in front of others. (Be truthful in what you say.)
Do acts of kindness for them over and over. (Luke 6:27-36,
5. Ask God to help you do what God is calling you to do.
Forgiveness is a godly act and God’s help is often required.
How do you know when you have forgiven someone?
When you can think of them and wish them well---and mean it.
Until you can do so, you need to continue to work on forgiving them
FOR YOU OWN GOOD.
“Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.”
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